Being a supermom (ehem, the title I am hoping will be bestowed upon me at some award ceremony) is hard. Being a supermom with well-meaning grandparents around is close to impossible.
I've been having problems with Angel's bedtime for a while. I have read The Baby Whisperer and followed the instructions word for word, but the book forgot to include one disclaimer: GRANDPARENTS NOT INCLUDED!
For months, she would play for hours in their room and come to bed at midnight, with her grandma patting her to sleep. So after revisiting the Baby Whisperer AND getting Secrets of the Baby Whisperer for Toddlers on the bedtime chapter, I tried again.
Establish a routine, the books say.
7 pm: Dinner.
8 pm: Get her butt upstairs and give her a bath. After the bath, attempt to give a very wriggly baby a body massage. (She relented for about 3 days and after that I gave up.) The massage was supposed to relax her...supposed to.
9 pm: Settle down in bed with her. Put on Barney (her favourite at the time) and stick a pacifier in her mouth. If she lets me, I turn off the lights. At about 10, I will give her a bottle.
The first night, she slept at 11pm without asking to go wreak havoc in grandma's room. Yay!
I continued the routine, and things were fine for a while. But two weeks ago, she started asking to go play in grandma's room again. I let her, but told her she needs to be back in half an hour. That was fine, and she still slept before midnight and I am the one who puts her to sleep.
The last three nights though, I am back to square one. When she comes back to the room, she has her grandma in tow. So it's back to grandma patting her to sleep.
The reason I wanted to establish a bedtime routine was I knew with the new baby coming, I would be exhausted. So I didn't want her to feel like I was 'handing' her over to her grandma. So if she could only get used to not having grandma in the room at night before she sleeps, then I could somehow find a way to put both her and the new baby to bed. I am, after all, supermom-to-be.